Soon I will be traveling again. Heading to far off lands near the land down under. I'll be landing in Denpasar which is the capital of Bali. I land at 1:15 am. Awkward I know. Ironically My friend who I am meeting managed to get a flight that is also landing at about 1am. Same day, so Random.
I have A LOT to somehow finish while still working near full quota Background painting. I have an upcoming show at Westboro beach with other artists and musicians. I got the okay for a tent from the Garlic Farm yesturday.
My Visa application for India got sent out today! I didn't know they take your passport and put it right in your passport. I still have to get a Visa for China. Tho China's processing time is faster then India so I should just squeeze it all in I think with some time to spare.
My printer decided to break finally today. It was already kinda broke. I've had to hand feed the paper one by one for months now. Of course it broke right after buying new ink haha. Course.
I came across a site today talking about the Penan People. Who are a Nomadic Aboriginal people. They live near Sarawak and Brune in Indonesia. I found them through a page about the ongoing fight in Brazil with the Aboriginals over the Belo Monte Dam. I was surprised to find that The news appears to be the Same in Indonesia as here. Presidents and Prime Ministers Talking about Free Trade, Massive Cover ups over the colonization of Aboriginal Groups. Including racial hate crimes and De-Humanized treatment over the Penan and their land. For what? For logging, oil palm plantations and hydroelectric dams.. Sounds closely linked to Brazil does it not. If you recall my writings on Guatemala in 2011 as well. The Maya have been and are still being systematically oppressed over the Spanish claim to their land and almost full colonization of the people. Very few if Any, Mayans remember their original Traditions in Full that were not corrupted by outside assimilation attempts.
Also, what is happening in Canada and the USA? Why its just about the same thing! Only we're all about the pipelines and fracking. I find it rather shocking how people aren't putting the pieces together of all this. Is Apathy really that bad in this world.? But this world I mean mainly North America. I can't blame Canadians or Americans for this tho. Because we are a result of Colonization. We are mostly decendants of those are still doing these crimes around the world today. We are them as a result. We look the other way. We have our happy distractions. Created on the backs of everyone else in the world.
Exploitation Exploitation, Exploitation. Its dis-hearting. I can't really buy anything made new. and from new materials. Knowing and seeing the destruction as a result of our current economic paradigm is all a bit much. I try to support hand made crafts, recycled creations, or consignment/used items. They have character, they have history. and they have a heart. They were created out of love. As a result, embody that essence of love with them.
I'm doing a poster for the "National Domestic Workers Movement" in India. I was put in contact with them through a friend. I have to design a poster showing the workers their new Minimum Wage rights. As most don't read, It will have to be visual.
When I was getting my Visa today I was flipping through a magazine for India. Last night I also found this amazing project in India called "Dewars India". Their description and videos are really amazing. I found them thru a Dub FX vid on Youtube. Who is inspiring and beyond this time in his own right. Check out the Dewarists About page and be inspired!
I'm really stoked to go to India and will try and spend a large leg of the end there if I can. Such an inspiring people. I've been highly interested in the Sacred Sanskrit of India and the Vedas. They are also like the Birthplace of Rainbows haha. I wish I was gunna be in India for Holi. The festival of colors.
This trip is taking an interesting turn right now. Issues involving those 2 areas of the trip are surfacing. I feel That this trip, like all my trips, and my daily life, Will not just be about taking snap shots of awe striking scenery. But since coming into so much new found awareness and connectedness with this world, I will surely go thru more shifts and changes in my consciousness and my awareness. So much happens to my already on a daily basis here in Ottawa that I can't even begin to Fathom all that will rush towards me when I am fully emersed in travelling again. Full on submerging into the waves of the universal flow. Total Surrendering to where it may take me. Open to what may come, and what is being offered to the growth of my soul.
Now to get all this pre-trip stuff done!! :)
Peace Peace Peace
Love Love Love
and lots of blessings of light to you all.
Sarah
Monday, August 13, 2012
Friday, August 10, 2012
Humanist of the Night
Many Walk and Many Talk
Some Pop and Some Lock
Maybe You Speak
And Maybe you Think
Gentle Grazes and Gentle Sweet Faces.
Some Sing and Some rock their Bling
Some Tussle and Some Flex therr Muscle
Some Watch and drink Scotch
Some Come in Quick Pound Shots
Moving Moving Moving
Beams of Light flicker and Flash
Highlighting Dust particles who've been stirred up by the night
All are
Moving Moving Moving
Bodies shift and shake
Hair sticks and Hair whips
All came here for the show.
Some perform Eligantly and
Some perform Disasteriously
Moving Moving Moving
Mouths Contort and Purse
Some expel harsh frequencies to the Air
Some expel Tonalities of Care
Moving Moving Moving
Weaning and Weaving
Swimming in through the Air
The Air is Moving Moving Moving
The Party Never ceases in the House of Air
So Take care
Because Air stares and stocks
Like a lioness in the desert
Waiting to Return
The Breath which was borrowed and Battered
Needs its morning after Shower
Some Pop and Some Lock
Maybe You Speak
And Maybe you Think
Gentle Grazes and Gentle Sweet Faces.
Some Sing and Some rock their Bling
Some Tussle and Some Flex therr Muscle
Some Watch and drink Scotch
Some Come in Quick Pound Shots
Moving Moving Moving
Beams of Light flicker and Flash
Highlighting Dust particles who've been stirred up by the night
All are
Moving Moving Moving
Bodies shift and shake
Hair sticks and Hair whips
All came here for the show.
Some perform Eligantly and
Some perform Disasteriously
Moving Moving Moving
Mouths Contort and Purse
Some expel harsh frequencies to the Air
Some expel Tonalities of Care
Moving Moving Moving
Weaning and Weaving
Swimming in through the Air
The Air is Moving Moving Moving
The Party Never ceases in the House of Air
So Take care
Because Air stares and stocks
Like a lioness in the desert
Waiting to Return
The Breath which was borrowed and Battered
Needs its morning after Shower
Thursday, July 26, 2012
The Void
Dare I not to journey into such depths.
Opening and closing doorways that lead you into the ultimate depth of knowledge.
A sacred knowledge of one.
The doors appear and disappear as tho moving in and out of time and space.
Remaining elusive and mysterious.
Flashes of truth, too quick to trust.
Like a tractor beam on a cloaked ship
I am pulled in.
A vastness knowing no end.
sure to devour me whole.
Never to return,
Forced to remain in this void for eternity.
Perhaps tho, I have known this void.
This eternity.
Perhaps this pull is from a place within.
Where lay dormant bits of molecules that remember their origin.
Their home
Leaving with me,
with the soul purpose in life to one day guide me back.
The door to the void found me at last.
I would already be holding the key.
and like the key,
I yearn to unlock the door that will take us to a new realm
a new adventure.
Like the void.
The adventure is unknown.
Nothing ventured
Nothing Gained.
So I willfully use the key and leap within
So I may see what their might be
Through the void.
Opening and closing doorways that lead you into the ultimate depth of knowledge.
A sacred knowledge of one.
The doors appear and disappear as tho moving in and out of time and space.
Remaining elusive and mysterious.
Flashes of truth, too quick to trust.
Like a tractor beam on a cloaked ship
I am pulled in.
A vastness knowing no end.
sure to devour me whole.
Never to return,
Forced to remain in this void for eternity.
Perhaps tho, I have known this void.
This eternity.
Perhaps this pull is from a place within.
Where lay dormant bits of molecules that remember their origin.
Their home
Leaving with me,
with the soul purpose in life to one day guide me back.
The door to the void found me at last.
I would already be holding the key.
and like the key,
I yearn to unlock the door that will take us to a new realm
a new adventure.
Like the void.
The adventure is unknown.
Nothing ventured
Nothing Gained.
So I willfully use the key and leap within
So I may see what their might be
Through the void.
Eternal Love
Like Matter we are pulled Together only to Fall apart.
Or so it would seem to those who saw.
In our world there was no time.
What appeared as a moment, to us was endless.
Feeling every particle draw nearer to yours,
one by one, those lonesome parts lingering subtly apart from us,
began to collide.
Within each impact worlds within Worlds joined like dominoes,
Each level as great and as awe in-sighting as the big bang
The birth of a star,
the creation of something new with the encompassing present.
As we glided at steady pace towards each other in the wave,
Sparks of new life erupting,
faster and faster like an underground detonation that exists,
In simple space.
At last the some total of each of our essences become one and for a moment,
We are conscious of our singular molecules joined in perfect harmony.
A moment that has forevor changed everything that we once knew of love.
As quickly as were brought together by the winds,
We begin to dissolve back to the matter we were created from,
Forever changed by our unified love in a flash.
This was how I discovered what true eternal love was
As a cloud.
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh The Hague, c. 4-8 August 1883
"For no particular reason, I cannot help adding a thought
that often occurs to me. Not only did I start drawing
relatively late in life, but it may well be that I shall not be
able to count on many more years of life either.
If I think about it dispassionately - as if making calculations for an estimate or a specification - then it is in the nature of things that I cannot possibly know anything definitely about it.
But by comparison with various people with whose lives one may be familiar, or by comparison with some with whom one is supposed to have some things in common, one can draw certain conclusions which are not completely without foundation.
So, as to the time I still have ahead of me for work, I think I may safely presume that my body will hold up for a certain number of years quand bien même [in spite of everything] - a certain number between 6 and 10, say. (I can assume this the more safely as there is for the time being no immediate quand bien même.)
This is the period on which I count firmly. For the rest, it would be speculating far too wildly for me to dare make a definite pronouncements about myself, seeing that it depends precisely on those first, say, ten years as to whether or not there will be anything after that time.
If one wears oneself out during these years then one won't live beyond 40. If one conserves enough strength to withstand the sort of shocks that tend to befall one, and manages to deal with various more or less complicated physical problems, then by the age of 40 to 50 one is back on a new, relatively normal course.
But such calculations are not relevant at present. Instead, as I started to say, one should plan for a period of between 5 and 10 years. I do not intend to spare myself, to avoid emotions or difficulties - it makes comparatively little difference to me whether I go on living for a shorter or longer time - besides I am not competent to manage my constitution the way, say, a physician is able to. And so I go on like an ignoramus, one who knows just one thing: within a few years I must have done a certain amount of work - I don't need to rush, for there is no point in that, but I must carry on working in complete calm and serenity, as regularly and with as much concentration as possible, as much to the point as possible. The world concerns me only in so far as I owe it certain debt and duty, so to speak, because I have walked this earth for 30 years, and out of gratitude would like to leave some memento in the form of drawings and paintings - not made to please this school or that, but to express a genuine human feeling. So that work is my aim - and when one concentrates on this idea, everything one does is simplified, in that it is not muddled but has a single objective. At present the work is going slowly - one reason more not to lose any time.
Guillaume Régamey was, I think, someone who left behind no particular reputation (you know there are two Régameys, F. Régamey paints Japanese people, and is his brother), but is nevertheless a personality for whom I have a great respect. He died at the age of 38, and one period of his life lasting 6 or 7 years was almost exclusively devoted to drawings with a highly distinctive style, done while he worked under some physical handicap. He is one of many - a very good one among many good ones.
I don't mention him to compare myself with him, I am not as good as he was, but to cite a specific example of self-control and willpower, sustained by one inspiring idea, which in difficult circumstances nevertheless showed him how to do good work with utter serenity.
That is how I regard myself, as having to accomplish in a few years something full of heart and love, and to do it with a will. Should I live longer, tant mieux, [so much the better] but I put that out of my mind. Something must be accomplished in those few years, this thought guides all my plans. You will understand better now why I have a yearning to press on - and at the same time some determination to use simple means. And perhaps you will also be able to understand that as far as I am concerned I do not consider my studies in isolation but always think of my work as a whole."
-Vincent Van Gogh
Read Full Letter
If I think about it dispassionately - as if making calculations for an estimate or a specification - then it is in the nature of things that I cannot possibly know anything definitely about it.
But by comparison with various people with whose lives one may be familiar, or by comparison with some with whom one is supposed to have some things in common, one can draw certain conclusions which are not completely without foundation.
So, as to the time I still have ahead of me for work, I think I may safely presume that my body will hold up for a certain number of years quand bien même [in spite of everything] - a certain number between 6 and 10, say. (I can assume this the more safely as there is for the time being no immediate quand bien même.)
This is the period on which I count firmly. For the rest, it would be speculating far too wildly for me to dare make a definite pronouncements about myself, seeing that it depends precisely on those first, say, ten years as to whether or not there will be anything after that time.
If one wears oneself out during these years then one won't live beyond 40. If one conserves enough strength to withstand the sort of shocks that tend to befall one, and manages to deal with various more or less complicated physical problems, then by the age of 40 to 50 one is back on a new, relatively normal course.
But such calculations are not relevant at present. Instead, as I started to say, one should plan for a period of between 5 and 10 years. I do not intend to spare myself, to avoid emotions or difficulties - it makes comparatively little difference to me whether I go on living for a shorter or longer time - besides I am not competent to manage my constitution the way, say, a physician is able to. And so I go on like an ignoramus, one who knows just one thing: within a few years I must have done a certain amount of work - I don't need to rush, for there is no point in that, but I must carry on working in complete calm and serenity, as regularly and with as much concentration as possible, as much to the point as possible. The world concerns me only in so far as I owe it certain debt and duty, so to speak, because I have walked this earth for 30 years, and out of gratitude would like to leave some memento in the form of drawings and paintings - not made to please this school or that, but to express a genuine human feeling. So that work is my aim - and when one concentrates on this idea, everything one does is simplified, in that it is not muddled but has a single objective. At present the work is going slowly - one reason more not to lose any time.
Guillaume Régamey was, I think, someone who left behind no particular reputation (you know there are two Régameys, F. Régamey paints Japanese people, and is his brother), but is nevertheless a personality for whom I have a great respect. He died at the age of 38, and one period of his life lasting 6 or 7 years was almost exclusively devoted to drawings with a highly distinctive style, done while he worked under some physical handicap. He is one of many - a very good one among many good ones.
I don't mention him to compare myself with him, I am not as good as he was, but to cite a specific example of self-control and willpower, sustained by one inspiring idea, which in difficult circumstances nevertheless showed him how to do good work with utter serenity.
That is how I regard myself, as having to accomplish in a few years something full of heart and love, and to do it with a will. Should I live longer, tant mieux, [so much the better] but I put that out of my mind. Something must be accomplished in those few years, this thought guides all my plans. You will understand better now why I have a yearning to press on - and at the same time some determination to use simple means. And perhaps you will also be able to understand that as far as I am concerned I do not consider my studies in isolation but always think of my work as a whole."
-Vincent Van Gogh
Read Full Letter
Saturday, March 10, 2012
Face to Book
Trapped within the confines of a book. A book with hand picked words
already wrote. Nothing new may be added to the story that is out of the
ordinary. But if it is hand written in, amongst the scribbles. It will
have no order, no face to put recognition to its place.
The mind in anarchy unable to place.
The face. You are no longer unique. Your words, your individuality stripped away and placed in boxes. Flat boxes with 2 sides in a dimensional tone.
You are not the coder, you are not the creator of this book any longer. Yet it is about you.
It operates under the guise to place you as lead or best in show.
Whose show?
If it were your show you would be writing the lines.
If it were your show, your actions, your words, your heart, would direct its flow.
There's no such place as that which you claim to be from. So it will not be placed in the box, the box will remain empty.
There is no such language that you claim to speak. So the box will remain empty.
The fantasy choked out from the grid lines that comprise the network.
The face. Comprised of lines, scars, and pores to abore.
Memories chiseled into the fabric of your pallet. Drawn to your story like a moth to the flame. Like a flower to the sun, like a dog to a bone.
Where's the box for that.
None.
Where's the box for your heart.
None.
The expanse would be too great to contain. Yet we created 4dimensional walls in a 2 dimensional space for 3 pointed symbol.
The mind in anarchy unable to place.
The face. You are no longer unique. Your words, your individuality stripped away and placed in boxes. Flat boxes with 2 sides in a dimensional tone.
You are not the coder, you are not the creator of this book any longer. Yet it is about you.
It operates under the guise to place you as lead or best in show.
Whose show?
If it were your show you would be writing the lines.
If it were your show, your actions, your words, your heart, would direct its flow.
There's no such place as that which you claim to be from. So it will not be placed in the box, the box will remain empty.
There is no such language that you claim to speak. So the box will remain empty.
The fantasy choked out from the grid lines that comprise the network.
The face. Comprised of lines, scars, and pores to abore.
Memories chiseled into the fabric of your pallet. Drawn to your story like a moth to the flame. Like a flower to the sun, like a dog to a bone.
Where's the box for that.
None.
Where's the box for your heart.
None.
The expanse would be too great to contain. Yet we created 4dimensional walls in a 2 dimensional space for 3 pointed symbol.
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Ode To My Dresser
Once my heart was filled with separation and holes.
I did not know this, but I felt this.
I tried to fill these holes in my heart with things.
Things that I found, things that saw.
But like a plant cut from its roots,
these temporary space fillers dissolved and quickly died off,
and the holes remained.
So did the separation within.
Little did I think to ask how these holes appeared
Were they always there?
And that is when I thought to look at the cause.
Hidden deep and buried.
Thru every cave that these holes carved in my heart.
Exploring the fast cavities and discovering the network of tunnels that lay inside me.
One by one I journeyed into these tunnels and removed the problems making them. Upon doing this the the tunnels began to disappear and the healing had begun.
So I am not just saying goodbye to my dresser as it goes onto a new life with a new roomy. I am saying thank you. Thank your for showing me by existing, what I needed to see inside myself.
And for being there by side on my journey. I have a long way to go yet.
I did not know this, but I felt this.
I tried to fill these holes in my heart with things.
Things that I found, things that saw.
But like a plant cut from its roots,
these temporary space fillers dissolved and quickly died off,
and the holes remained.
So did the separation within.
Little did I think to ask how these holes appeared
Were they always there?
And that is when I thought to look at the cause.
Hidden deep and buried.
Thru every cave that these holes carved in my heart.
Exploring the fast cavities and discovering the network of tunnels that lay inside me.
One by one I journeyed into these tunnels and removed the problems making them. Upon doing this the the tunnels began to disappear and the healing had begun.
So I am not just saying goodbye to my dresser as it goes onto a new life with a new roomy. I am saying thank you. Thank your for showing me by existing, what I needed to see inside myself.
And for being there by side on my journey. I have a long way to go yet.
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