Happy New Year to the People of Earth

I just wanted to blog today about the word "Indigenous".

Definition: "Originating and living or occurring naturally in an area or environment"

In school we learned about how the Colonizers came from Britain to Canada and signed these treaties which allowed them to build settlements and "share the land" with the "Indigenous" Peoples of this land, formerly and still referred to as "Turtle Island". The term Indigenous in this sense refers to the people who originated on this land first. In this day and age tho The world is comprised of different Indigenous groups. The separating lines in our lineages are reaching lines of no separating with cross cultural marriages and children now being born with multiple indigenous backgrounds. What this means is that we can no long define the term Indigenous to a specific land or place. We are all indigenous to Earth now. So This whole #IdleNoMore Movement is about people. The people of Earth no longer allowing the terms and definitions to separate us. The class and race categorizations is old world logic. The only reason why the demands and voices of people aren't being heard by our "elected" governments is because our governments are holding onto old world logic, and old world systems.
 
Some people say "Things will never change". But when I look and feel, all around me, the chemical makeup of our melting pot of a country and world heating as we are all stirred together to the point we are at now, all it takes is for someone to finally burst and expand from the pressure and create something new to add to the mixture to create the door to be opened for another to expand and jump in, and another, and another, until eventually the whole pot is boiling and so jam packed full of movement and energy that once the heat is turned down we are left with the end result. Which is the perfect mixture of all the ingredients. Each one now changed by the experience and expansions of those before them and eventually themselves.

A delicious new recipe is now ready to be served up to future generations to 'mange' on and change and adapt with time as well.

The key to evolution is not a race to see who can make a better soup, or argue that the soup is perfect and doesn't need to change, but to be creative and experimental, and allow that space in our collective function for new ingredients and ideas to shape the soup of the future.

So to the nay Sayers and those who are afraid to change the soup,  you are more then welcome to eat the same soup for the rest of your life, but me, I'm going toss in a carrot or a piece of bark, maybe some cinnamon or a dash of vanilla and see if it could be better then it was yesterday.

So Peace, and Cheers to a new year, with new ideas, new beginnings, and a step forward for Humanity to a world without seperations, but the culmination of 4 corners of thought and 5 races of people.

Peace
Sarah

The Why and Where of Art in the 21st century

There isn't much that makes me more happy then having not been able to get into a Fine Arts program at a University when I finished High school. I didn't have the academic English required. Tho I aced my applied English class because it was better laid out for my brain. I do however wish I had a wider array of skills at my disposal by now to choose and create from. But I'm happy about this because I didn't have teachers or books to influence my eyes. Telling me what they they thought was the reason for an artist using this brush stroke or that. It's not like they could ask the artist so where does this opinion even come from? Even now When I got to art galleries I never use the audio guides or read very far into the inscriptions except for the date, name, and medium.  I've found that after you go thru your own process of understanding why you personally paint and use the brush strokes that you do, a lot of other art comes into your field of understanding. This became clear when I went to the Van Gogh exhibit in Ottawa this past year, and I got the book of letters to his brother Theo. Doesn't have all of them, but a wonderful read. From reading that I was opened to a whole perspective on the artists of history. I had this weird idea in my brain of artists from the past. The show completely transformed me. And following Van Gogh I saw the Picasso Exhibit. Phew!! Even more mind blowing. Both brilliant in their own right. Van Gogh had a bit of a tougher Gogh with his reality, living in solitude for the most part, spending days walking about the country side and painting the landscapes. It wasn't to just capture in material form the essence of the beauty of the places he was in. Art for Van Gogh was very much his therapy. He used it to understand the world around him. The daily struggles, and harvests, to the purity and simplicity of flowers. Twas no easy feet fighting with the norm of the day. It never is. From reading his letters, the words he would speak to his brother reveal a very sincere and honest bond. One that Vincent could only share with his brother. Knowing on one would understand his thoughts, his torments and laments within his heart. The soft love starved side that felt unworthy because it felt tainted by the complexities of understanding.

Picasso had an easier and for expedient process of coming to terms with these thoughts. Having had Vincent pave the way before him no doubt attributed to this. Picasso's art focused on a next level of thought. Unlike Vincent who spent his time trying to understand the world as it is seen. Picasso Attempted to deconstruct the world and re-order it to see if the feeling or essence of that world would be intact still. This is my interpretation anyway. So following this procession into the period we are currently living in. With all the knowledge of the pioneers of art and techniques before us. Of the some total of humanities achievements thru visual reference. I ask the question, "where to next?". Well the next is happening right now. And its..well.. a cluster fuck of everything! Of people who do imitation art to People who do duplications of set designs for aesthetics. To those who want to re-construct styles of the past, and then their are those who thru all of this jumble of the all, are still looking onward and forward. Attempting to make something new. There could be varying degrees of this. Such as those who wish to make something new based on the building blocks of accumulated knowledge of art and technique to date. But perhaps I'm being too logical with that statement. For that is the procession of how time works is it not? We cannot lift our foot to climb the next step without first having gotten to the step we are already on... So looking at the step before us again. I'm using Picasso as an example for my writing at this time. He deconstructed our reality to understand it.

May a I propose a theory as to what I 'feel' is happening at this time. More and more people are leaning towards the quantum theory of the sciences. It's a magical and mystical side to life. One that is not so easily comprehended but once understood, is also so easily comprehended!! Haha. Beautiful eh? More and more people are finding that deconstruction "Reality" as the artist of the past once saw it seems futile. So the attempt in the artist is now to understand the idea of a reality we only beginning to perceive! I say perceive and not see, why? Because I think the quantum reality for it to first become something tangible in your mind it has to be first felt thru this illogical feeling. You can attempt to put thoughts to it, but thoughts only seem to muck it up and make it less naturally perfect like trying to put words to a concerto. So we take the only route possible into this next phase in art theory, which is unconscious feeling based painting.

I feel art is going to be a great educator for the 21st century. In a society with so much chaos of the mind and heart connection, leading us to more and more mental illnesses, and addictions, art will be a source of much healing. Healing our self judgments, and egoic inner bantering, to the ordering of pieces into places externally creating the ground work for the ordering of pieces internally.

So paint, draw, sculpt, create! Create to understand why you create. You can't understand why you create what you create, until you first act and create! Then have a direction to angle your 'why's' at!

Where logic fails, Art will prevail.
Live love and Prosper friends.

The language of Art, and my inner peace.

I've been writing a lot of poetry lately. I often look back on conversations with friends or family and think about all that I could of said. All that I know and understanding but find the words that come out of my mouth so trivial in comparison to the magnitude of my thoughts.

It wasn't until the past year that I discovered that ones voice isn't always in the words or language that they speak with their mouths. It's about sound. The vibration, the frequency, the pitch and even the flow. But it isn't even about sound either. I often prefer to work in silence at times so that I have no influences. I find the influence of that around me to be disruptive almost to the purity of the creative process. But that is only when I create from nothingness. By nothingness I mean to imply that I have no pre-concieved ideas or notions as to what the piece will become. This is my favourite way to create but isn't always possible. The idea of having Nothing to put onto paper can leave me stagnant for quite a while. 

Hm
Eventually tho I must create the force that will propel my hand to act. I may not have a known direction to move in, But I find the motion enough. It is the ultimate *F-U* to my egoic self judgments of having no ideas to create from. So if I'm not creating from my mind and thoughts then where am I creating from? My heart?

Some would still argue that I am indeed creating from my thoughts still subconsciously. But some things I create are unexplainable. I find I cannot define them. Perhaps because of the term "Abstract" which in my understanding is a form of painting emotions or feelings of the mind. And even tho ppl knock abstract to its core saying that the technique's used to reflect this intangible feeling onto paper is something anyone can do, while neglecting the FACT that no, not everyone CAN do this. That it takes years of soul searching within yourself to know yourself. To know why you feel and to understand your emotions and then to somehow put all of that process into an image outside of yourself is so mindblowingly amazing that to de-legitamize that results technique shows how much you don't have a clue about about your understanding of your own feelings.

Feelings can create a certain vibration as well. When you get angry you can feel the heightened or sped up current of flow pulsing through your body. When you are Sad may feel the pains of tears that drop your whole vibration like someone piling weights on you and like an open door on a space ship, all your energy is pulled out in the vaccum. Happiness is opposite, It's like all of sudden you become your own power station and are creating energy and giving it away to all around you.

I've created in all 3 of these states before. And the results are exactly a reflection of those states. But its like an uncontrollable outpouring of mind vomit resulting in the exactness of the moment I aimed to capture. Down to a tee. And I only learned this by ppl who were somehow able to explain to me in-depth, pieces of every moment that lead up to the piece of art or poetry they see now.  I don't think I'll name my art anymore. I don't want to trivialize what someone may see with what I think its about, because honestly I have no idea how much of my own experiences have gone into a work.

I image that it's even possible to surpass the experiences of my own mind and pull out bits of memories embeded in my DNA structure. And why not? You may have had just thought, "What?? That's a little farfetched". People can have flashes of memories that aren't from this time, and feel the connection to it like it was but knowing its from another point in the spiral of time.

It's really fascinating to think that all of our past experiences, (and I mean Past) are still connected to us, like our love and hate for our friends and families. We always remember. But until we've completed the missions of our karma we can never progress onward in the game. Or we can but we know we beat the game with unfinished sidequests haha. (RPG lingo)

So back to my original thought of creating from nothingness. That's when it gets interesting. When I am not creating from the influence of emotion or thoughts anymore. Not an easy state to always find but is possible for sure. When I am completely neutral and balanced.

That is when things that are so fantastical start to emerge. I've always loved fantasy. People who know me well know that I am a dreamer. I yearn to sleep at night to see what dreams may come. So when I get create absolutely ANYTHING I want from nothing it so daunting it is paralyzing the fear of unknowing what will come, but then once motion has begun I think about how I could have ever been afraid that nothing would come. And then like a roller coaster, I'm just flying! Hitting new turns and loops, anxieties start to be created as a result of this whole thing, then sleep deprivation sets. The piece starts to influence my life and my dreams, conversations start happening that may never have happened as a result of creating something from nothing and MAN!! To be able to do that!! It's so wild.. So friggen Wild, I dont' ever want to stop once I'm going, cuz I know building that momentum again is gunna be a pain haha and I don't want to come down.

Art is my language! I'm free in art. The world is such a downer these days y'know. People are going every which way. So much confusion. All trying to solidify statements and ideas that they gather from news papers, the tv, other scientists. Trying to answers and only being met with more confusion.
Just listen to Yoda..

"No! Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try."

The outside world is crumbling because no one is finding their OWN voice. If people were at peace with the chaos they feel inside, the world would know peace

"Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering." -YODA

So truly don't be afraid of the nothingness that you think may exist in place of the answers this world is trying so desperately to give. Their is no truth as we think we know it in the operations of this world. Because all those "facts' we were taught in school growing up aren't facts anymore, they are nothing.

Trust yourself, Love yourself, and be honest with yourself. Do away with the fear of not knowing, And just enjoy the ride of discovering. Look forward not back, and live today with the peace within that you didn't have yesterday.

and
Create from YOUR truth.

hahah Happy Monday I guess.

Forevour a grain in Space

A drop of sand I be
On the infinite shore
Always I will exist among many

I take on my place,
With the space I displace

Holding my shape
The algorithmic colours,
The Ascending, Descending and spiraling Lines
that compose my shape,
between the pockets of space that forevour lay between the all.

Longing to shift nearer
to close this space.

But with no legs to propel my form,
Constantly I am depending on the motion of others to shift me in my place
So that I may close this space and feel the comfort of a touch.

But every time the gaps between are removed as a result of my own inability to propel my form

I'm left wanting again.

Because it is not in the act of touch I long,
But in the action I Self Perpetuate to propel the Matter with my Force.

The Matter that,
Like a chain link,
Pulls with it the keys that have unlocked my force,

So that when I arrive and make contact
I know that I have retained my form.

Because tho I am but a mere grain in the sands of time,

I know that it is in the totalities of each grains journey
that propel the authenticity in the waves of our collective motion.

So in my individual form I will remain
Humbled and sovereign in this place,

In My Space

No longer will I arrive as a result
Only as a propelled pursuit.

This Christmas

http://urbanlegends.about.com/library/bl_ben_stein_christmas.htm

READ THIS ^

I wasn't sure what this was being passed around Facebook because their wasn't much in the comment box below it. But I read it.

Think for yourselves, develop your own way of living based on trial and error and not the accumulation of other peoples trials and errors, and be true to you. The you that lives in balance and harmony with their own selves and their own lives.

Not the you that you are afraid to be, and afraid to show, because you care what others will think of you. Having the title Christian, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist, and Atheist doesn't mean that you miraculously have a clue, It means your searching for some form of definition to the universe.

Well the universe never asked for a definition, so stop trying to give it one and just watch the unfolding of its beauty that is beyond our word Devine with your eyes(seeing) and with your heart (feeling) and not your brain (defining)

I'll admit I've had my ups and downs with the matter, but no pursuit of personal truth is ever done in vain and for nothing. So Be Lost and Be found, Find Your truth shining beneath the layers of false truths, chaos, and illusions starting today. No one can tell you how so stop watching documentaries and posting quotes that you think will make you look better in the eyes of your peers in this lucid platform of space, and

Merry Christmas and God Bless you all sincerely down to the matter at the core of your being in the coming days/years/aeons.

A Matter of Seaing and Being

The mass joining of all the arrangements of molecules in a culminating cluster
In Time,
In the Physical,
As

One movement propelling forward in a chaotic shuffling order

Linear and erradict
Leaders in the movement, shuffling to the front and to the back,

For

It matters not.
All in this flux will participate in reaching the furthest stretches across the granular materially littered shores, emanations and reflections in opposition to their liquid form.

Sands look up and see their long lost selves in immaterial form.

Some Jump to rejoice in the reunion with their other halves, in the process being swept away and pulled back into the familiar space of the flowing void.

Others barely hold their ground wishing their friends and neigbours well in their pursuits.

Some molecules that managed to stretched beyond the furthest of the few before them became lost and seperated from the collective motion and remained with the form.
Dissolving completely and settling in the space between.

Others turn back, grabbing pieces along the way,
Returning to their places in the vast openness of the sea,
Where they will live and await another chance at another time when again they will go in pursuit,

Some will descend into the depths, destined to spend moments of countless reflection at the current above,

and others,

Journey back to the outer reaches to the shores of form where the far reaches await their discovery.

The Within and Without of Water

Water flows within and without my being.
I breath in, derailing the en-lightened water on its ascent to the skies
Taking it inside of me, I transmute it.
Cells mix and match within
I breath out the now transformed water
So that it may carry on its pursuit to the heavens above.

A Cloud sweeps it up and they now journey into and out of being across the skies

Water remembers its immortality as it swirls and flows above,
Uniting with Particles from centuries past
Playing with the quarks and molecules,
They dance upon the highest of the high
To the outer reaches of the barriers of blue.

Until once again choosing to partake in the cyclical decent back.

Free-Falling, as a spiraling fractal,
It returns to its primordial form
Transcending the barriers of its anti-mattered existence
It returns to a state of matter

Twirling and flipping it takes on various partners for support in the dance of decent

Crash
Spread and,
Rest

It lays in pieces shocked by the impact

As it returns to its awareness
For a faint moment, All the joys and experiences return to the surface of remembrance

and then

As quickly as it remembered its wholeness in the history of history, it begins to fall away in the act of letting go, and forgetting

As the water is re-absorbed back to into the Earth
Fragmented and divided
The journey of remembering, uniting and ascending begin again,

With a deep inhale and hold
I dive into the river once again and drink from it the clarity I will need to continue

On my journey within its never ceasing flow.

Cambodia and 2 days with the Israeli.

On Sept 22 me and Steph were on our way to Cambodia by bus. While at the border crossing we started chatting with a fellow who was on our bus to get info about where we were supposed to go. We payed 25 U.S Dollars (20 of which went to our visa on arrival and 5 of which went as a bribe to the men we assume work for the bus company.. ) He was an Israeli man about 23 years old. I'll leave his name out...

He seemed like an okay fellow. But the odd time what came out of his mouth was quite unsettling, and often had this look of disgust or disapproval on his face. He came and sat near us close to the end of the bus trip and we chatted about our travels. He had been to Laos and was telling us about his experiences there. He went "River Tubing" a lot in Vang Vieng. Where a few people die every year from the Tubing. Apparently you just hop on a tube and drink all day long. You can just get booze while in the tube from river front bars or something. And if you take the wrong turn at the Y river split then you'll head down a treacherous path with a lot of jagged rocks. He told us of a girl who was passed out drunk in her tube who almost died. While sitting on the bus chatting about how great this tubing thing sounds... He starts laughing at something out the window. I ask what was funny and he said, "I just saw 2 men on a motorbike looking so gay", me and Steph were pretty stone faced at this comment. In that moment we were glad Erin wasn't there to hear it.. But how was he to know that me and Steph weren't a couple traveling. Like really. We were freezing on this bus the whole time, I put my head on her shoulder, we were just exhausted. We both secretly hoped he thought we were gay when I did that haha. By this point I'm just finished with this guy. And then Steph asks him if he wants to share a taxi or tuk tuk to find a hostel or internet cafe. In my head I'm Screaming Shut up!!) She later promised me she wouldn't b nice anymore lol.

So we get our bags, I make the Tuk Tuk drivers do Rock Paper Scissors to be our Driver. It works so awesome!! And no one feels bad cuz the other driver gets more business. They get to drive us fare and square!! Our drivers name was RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICKY BobbY!! I wish I could do the voice on this stupid blog for you haha. Ask me in person!! Anyway he was a nice young guy. We had a hostel name in mind for Pnom Phen that was suggested to me by a guy named David who I talked to on the phone through a mutual friend. He was in Canada but lived in Cambodia helping with water Purification here. So in my notebook it said "Me Mates Place" and "Street 88" so I thought it was on street 88, But it was another hostel. Ricky Bobby took us to a hostel named Street 88 and we were like Noo!! This isn't right, We want to go to Me Mates Place!! haha so he took us to Me Mates Place on some other street. And We arranged to have him meet us and be our driver in the morning for a day trip. But then we go inside and they were full!! Unlucky! But they got us a tuk tuk and took us to their other hostel.. the first one we went to.. "Street 88" haha we felt so shitty for telling ricky he was wrong!! Well me and Steph did. Our Israeli friend didn't have feelings of remorse in his programing. So we get in and we are greeted by such a kind hearted soul named  "Johnny". Real cool guy, Who we never got to say goodbye to :(, I liked calling him Rockin Johnny..


Anyway we go upstairs to look at a dorm with our packs n stuff, and as we are walking down the stairs The Israeli guy looks up at us and asks, "Aren't you worried about your pregnancy?" Our jaws dropped to the floor, LITERALLY. I look at Steph and say "I'm not pregnant, are you pregnant??" She's like "I'm not pregnant..", and it had to do with something about if a woman lifts heavy objects it may impede her ability to conceive children or produce good offspring.. Luckily Steph has training in Sports Medicine and set him straight with facts, saying it's just an old wise tale.

We end up getting a private room with 4 beds to share.. God I didn't want to share a room with him.. Oh well tho.. RAR. So we head down to the lobby to get some dinner. He made a stop at the desk to look at the bus schedule board. He had asked Johnny earlier if their was an overnight bus to some town I can't remember now and Johnny had said no. Looking at the board he saw that there was in fact one, and instead of being polite or just matter of factually saying "Oh hey look there is a midnight bus! Awesome I'll get a ticket!" He pointed it out to Johnny and made certain to make him feel like an incompetent fool and is a shit human being basically, Gawd it was sad to watch...We felt really bad for Johnny watching this, and I did make some comments to lighten the mood, didn't really seem to phase our Israeli friend but Johnny brightened up again, You could just see his slinking and crushing of his whole demeanor. We went to get dinner at the bar/lounge attached to the hotel. Our friend was raving on and on about his $12 dollar a day budget he had to keep. He had some extra money that day in the budget I guess and had dinner of a hamburger and fries, and then got another dinner of hamburger and fries then preceded to tell us how he lost all this weight and how good he looked(he wasn't that fit from what we saw) but used to weigh a lot more I guess. Over dinner we unraveled that he was a reservist in the military in Israel. There were certain countries he wasn't allowed to visit with his Israeli passport, and he had a France passport he usually used but that was too close to expiry to use to travel. He also really didn't like telling people he was Israeli. We ended up on the topic of Singapore, Probably telling him about how we almost got stuck there when we we were trying to get to VietNam. He made a comment about how he can't go there with an Israeli Passport. I ask why, naturally. He said Singapore is on the side of their Enemy... Palestine. Stephanie asked the question that I was itching to ask.. "What's the story with Palestine and Israel" (something like that) he didn't want to really get into it, obviously. I slinked off to draw and he went upstairs and skyped for like 4 hours with his family and girlfriend traveling in South America.

The next day we got up and had breakfast, This girl Dani joined our posse for the day and we all shared a tuk tuk. The hotel told the other hotel where we were staying so they could tell our driver. It wasn't Ricky Bobby.. We noticed that The young guys reeel the tourists in at night for the older guys who just want to work to do the day trips. We got used to it. But Ricky Bobby was so awesome haha.
Our Penny pinching Israeli friend haggled this guy scraping to get the cheapest deal. It didn't feel right.. IT felt shady. Like its not that big of a deal if we pay a lil extra so that people here can have a better life for their families and also to keep up in this global market and maybe even travel themselves one day. Which you certainly can't do on the kind of salary that people here get. Our friend Johnny told us he wanted to go to Law School in Canada. We have no way of knowing if this is the truth or if its a tourist pity line. But It inspired deep thoughts about how we bargain and the real cost of it while traveling to other countries.

And so we were off for the day. First stop, "The Killing Feilds". Learning about Khmer Rouge and what happened in Cambodia right after we learned about what America did in VietNam just a few years before the Khmer rose to power, placed us in the path of history. Seeing how all the travesties and wars happened one after the other in this part of the world, really makes you think. It's almost as though WWII opened a gateway for *Messed up Shit* to pour into the world from the same dark dimension if I can put it that way. It doesn't matter what Country your in or who you are. You still kill and you still hate the same way when you place people in the category as scum on your boot that has to be wiped off. The kinds of things that happened at this field were beyond shocking. Especially the special tree covered in bracelets gifts that was once used by the Khmer Rouge to smash babies against. Needless to say I was having a little trouble thinking that any sort of food would be an option today.

Me and the Israeli man ended up getting stranded in a small covered spot when a downpour hit suddenly. Here's my chance I thought.. So he asked me what I thought about the today, and I said something along the lines of, "Its amazing, That another group of people could treat people in such a way", and "I don't understand why these kinds of things happen", Looking back now here's hoping I said something like that. I asked him the same question and he replied, "My thoughts are best kept to myself." I kept thinking about what I would think if I were in his shoes. Traveling so much and learning about the history of other countries and yet, doing what I'm doing at the same time in my own country in a way. He said he had worked the border crossing as well. I asked him for a rundown of what is happening with Palestine and Israel. He told me that back in the day, Israel would be attacked daily and for their safety they had to put a wall up around these people. Because they are trying to kill Israeli's. So they had to! And that Palestine is an imaginary country and it's not real. They tried to make peace deals with the people and give them some land but they wanted all the land. The great Israeli army (according to him) conquered and occupied Egypt, Jordan, and some other places. But Being the peace making treaty signing, forward thinking nation that they are, returned the land they won in battle. Except of course Palestine, which never existed. He also said that Palestinians hate Jews...

I wish I knew more about the Palestinian conflict when I met this guy. I knew some but even I had forgotten the details. I was told once that Winston Churchill gave it to someone, without actually knowing anything about Palestine. I found this snippet on Wiki but it is hard to decipher the fancily worded trade talks.

"The Palestine position is this. If we deal with our commitments, there is first the general pledge to Hussein in October 1915, under which Palestine was included in the areas as to which Great Britain pledged itself that they should be Arab and independent in the future . . . Great Britain and France—Italy subsequently agreeing—committed themselves to an international administration of Palestine in consultation with Russia, [and the Sharif of Mecca] who was an ally at that time . . . A new feature was brought into the case in November 1917, when Mr Balfour, with the authority of the War Cabinet, issued his famous declaration to the Zionists that Palestine 'should be the national home of the Jewish people, but that nothing should be done—and this, of course, was a most important proviso—to prejudice the civil and religious rights of the existing non-Jewish communities in Palestine. Those, as far as I know, are the only actual engagements into which we entered with regard to Palestine."^[5]
The part where it says "Palestine 'should be the national home of the Jewish People.." was rather intriguing to read tho... Since Palestinians hate Jews so much according to our Jewish Israeli friend..

So me being who I be, said something like.. "Why do you fight over land when no one really owns any land. We just created pieces of paper and wrote land ownership and them and invented a legal system to validate said papers, but the land was here long before humans, and it'll be here long after." And also that our Country too was going through these same land arguments with out aboriginal and Indigenous peoples. He said in response, "Ooooh your one of those people we call Crazy" hahah I almost lost it, I couldn't believe he said that... My reply, "Well call me crazy but I think if we got over this grip for power and phony ownership the world would be a much different place..

I prolly made him uncomfortable (as I usually do when people hear me say things that challenge the logic behind the entire reality that they have created for themselves..) and he scooted off in the rain to "Find Steph and Dani".

I'm grateful to have been brought into this young mans path.. I can only hope that somewhere past his thick skull that a part of him that still listens with his heart heard my words.. Especially now that they are attacking Palestine. A cowardly act seeing as they are walled in.. It's like going into a play ground at a school and opening fire. Or a classroom. What I don't understand is, how can he think that Palestine isn't real, or never was a real country. This conflict seems FAR FAR too complicated to have just been dreamed up don't you think? Like why create a fake country, fake name all that to allow yourselves to be caged by that dreamed up status and live caged lives. Was the the Israeli army that bored? They just need something to torture to keep them entertained? He made a comment about the government in Palestine being illegitimate and full of terrorist as well! I mean the whole conversation was like a dream. He laughed and voiced his disgust on our way to a school holding facility site because he saw 2 men hugging saying, "they are touching so gay," we all didn't say anything.

We bit our tongue a lot with this fellow and were happy to ditch him for dinner saying we were gunna go to an ATM and then find an internet cafe. We ended up eating Korean food which Steph and Dani were ecstatic about, having just been teaching in Seoul for a year and 2 years for Dani I think.

I'm not pro Israel, and I'm not Pro Palestine. I'm pro freedom and pro psychological therapy. Both things that are seriously lacking in this world. We can convince ourselves (and we do everyday) That our way is right when its not and make up WHOLE illusion based reality as a result just so we don't have to know the truth which we fear will collapse our world. I don't know how we got so wrapped up in the lies. But it's getting worse at every turn..

I can only encourage all to live true. Live true to you, which you can only do if you know and understand the world from yourself and thru your own eyes. Never be afraid of the truth. Sometimes (most of the time) It's hard to want to know the truth. Either because it's hard to find or uncover, or its hard to want to choose that and leave the illusion behind. Because the unknown world like that of anti-matter is mysterious and our perceptions deem it as a void. But just because we have to attach images to this unknown side of life does not mean their is anything to fear. Like a child who first enters the world. We can only do and then see, and thus know.

I think nothing done in the pursuit of truth will be in vain. You may never see a single result in your lifetime (very doubtful) but you create waves in the ocean of time that propel water particles onto the shores of the infinitesimal amounts of sand grains, each holding the key to a world you never imagined until you left behind the structure and safety of the known and open the door to the unknown

XoX
Sarah

Sept 12th Ho Chi it to me baby

Well. Vietnam has been quite the learning experience thus far. Day one we flew to Singapore Airport from Denpasar. The start of the day went off without a hitch and everything flowed very smoothly. I did a painting collaboration the day before with a local artist named Suarsa, and I had called him early in the morning to say I would take the painting with me, I wanted me too but I didn't think I could carry it around, and couldn't afford to ship it. So he brought it to my hotel and we got everything packed up. I left some clothes behind to lighten my load some. Also some inscents as a gift to the family. who ran the place.

We boarded the first plane with no problems and were off to Singapore. The decent into the Singapore airport was a picturesque view of oil tankers and drilling pipes all around the coast...  We got our bags and headed for check-in. We didn't think it started yet so we were gunna get some tasty japanese food ( in know..) but then we saw our check-in flight counter so we went up, and then we were refused boarding because we didn't have a letter for a visa upon arrival!!! So we had to use Stephs ipad (thank god we had some sort of computer..note to self, get a frackin laptop) to apply for a visa online thru a 3rd party site. We couldn't just call the embassy because they had JUST closed (double doh). We applied for a rush visa, and it would have cost us about 30 dollars to get the visa orginally, but it ended up costing us like 250... frgs@%kS%3kaglersnuff. We got the email approval after about an hour and a half or something. Luckilly the airport had cool gold water droplet things that raised and lowered from the cieiling in 2 seconds to make cool ass 3 dimensional  designs to keep my stress at bay lol. 

*eep visa wtf do we stay in sing... whaaaaaat its making particle waves...omg we have like 1 hour before our flight leaves and... now its creating a ball shape hovering over a wormhole omfg* 

We got the email approval! packed up our pile of luggage, and headed to the check-in counter.... only... there was no one there... all the screens had pictures of Jet Star logos on them with no flight details.. fuck me...moment. pardon my language.. But we just spent 250 dollars for... nothing... I dont thiiink so! Tracked down the manager. Showed her the letter. Got moved to the front of another flights check-in line... waited patiently.... for the 4 ladies with like 8 shopping bags full of duty free stuff to get weighed... check in. Then ran for security. Seeing that our flight was on it's last call for boarding, we started a light jog.. Then seeing our gate was the last one in the terminal (always.. idk how I always pick the last gosh darn gate with like all flights...) We started running down the moving walkways breaking up couples gingerly holding hands at a stand still. 

Flashes of my flight to Guatemala from Toronto running thru my head.. Then We arrived, with still a few ppl waiting in line!! Woo Woo!! the weird thing is that the security checks at this and in Denpasar were all AT the gates and not at the entry into terminals. 

We were on the plane!! No tvs on the plane. And we did order a meal when we booked the flight, but our tickets didn't say so.. boooo. So I paid 10 dollars for a gross stew thing and a bun, which was just a McDonalds lookin hamburger bun... that wasn't even cut in half lol.. I couldn't get the plastic off my stew mush. the sides of the plastic wrapping on it just peel off around it not breaking the seal. So I stared stabbing it with my fork and knife (both sides..) and they  were just bending to the whim of this plastic!! I have tears in my eyes from laughing at how ridiculous the whole day was lol. 

We got to Ho Chi Minh and their was a man waiting with our names on a sign.

dishearted with Day One in Ho chi Minh

So we got to the airport and a guy was standing there with a sign with our names on it, we gave him our passports. they told us we would have to get our pictures taken there for the visa, but that never happened. we got our visa's. Met a nice girl whose bags were taken before getting on the plane, full of stuffed animals and presents for a school she was working at.

We paid for an airport taxi instead of dealing with a regular taxi. We prolly over-paid but it's okay for piece of mind. The place we are staying at turned out to be down this alley way and not on a main road.. so we were like.. Wtf.. lol.. and so was our taxi driver!! But we found it and rang the bell and Camille came to answer. It was about 11:30 when we arrived. I messaged her the day before from Bali on Couchsurfing.org. Which we had tried to do in Ubud but it didn't work out. Camille is staying in a shared apt accommodation. It's very interesting. No one has locks on their doors. Their rooms are just like a bachelor pad inside, and their is a bathroom on each floor for 2 apts to share. They share 1 medium/small fridge, and a stove top on the counter. Plus the roof has 2 patios that are really incredible. Camille is here on an internship for school in France and so is her friend  Hiba who lives on the same floor. (2 rooms a floor, 6 ppl live here.) Their is a Vietnamese man named Duc and another Vietnamese man (but from America), named Peter. They are all early, to mid 20's, and their is a random older couple around 40 who lives here as well.

We finally got to inflate our therm-a-rests that we've been carting around with us! Exciting stuff!! Her room is on the 4th floor of a spiral staircase. So we are getting a good leg work-out, reminds me of Paris with Liane in May 2011.

 Next day we went out on the town. Walked towards the water. It was a lovely hot day. All we had heard about was how it was rainy season and it just rained allll the time. And it did rain that night, but was done by the time we went out. By 11am we had walked for maybe 20 mins, and we were trying to find a place to get some food. I saw a cafe but didn't say anything cuz I thought we could do better (in my head..) and we kept walking, we stood by the side of the road waiting to see how we would cross 4 lanes of busy traffic with no light or stop signs.. So we were standing at the edge. I had my backpack on, and my red plastic clutch in my hand with the strap around the wrist. Then a motorbike with 2 guys on it pulled up and looked as tho they were stopping, but it was super close to us, so I took a step back and then the guy on the back grabbed my clutch and the driver gunned it!! I held onto that sucker like you wouldn't believe and the damn wrist strap broke. Steph apparently was holding onto me cuz she thought they were trying to grab me! When the strap broke she thought it was my wrist! So they got my purse and drove off. Luckilly I planned for this and had most of my money in my bra :P but I had my bag keys in their too, with my Animation festival Lanyard from my last year of volunteering. haha Balls. Now I'll have to volunteer to get a new lanyard. But I'll be traveling during the festival this year!! Haha Ce la vie I suppose.  So a little shaken up, thinking, did that just seriously happen??

Some trolley drivers (who cart tourists around..) came and helped us cross the street, saying "They gotchyaa" Telling us its the gang, they no work, just want cocaine -while doing needle in vein actions. They told us to go report it. I didn't wanna bother, it wasn't much money, and it's not worth the police's time. They kept trying to get us into their trolleys, but I'm like, I don't have any money!! They just got my wallet, plus the visa stuff, the last thing I wanted was to blow more money.. They were like, we take u around and then we drop you off at hotel and you go in and get money to pay us. They wanted 400,000 for the day. ($20) but we walked away, and promised we'd go straight to the police station. So we're walking, walking, and they are following, following... They stuck a deal for (what I thought was 17,000..but was 70,000...each) So we went  hopped in.. they took us down the road, then down this weird side street, which they never mentioned before so we would have never found it basically. They dropped us off. Pointed to what looked like just another store.. said it was the Police Station. Their was a few cops chilling on bikes texting, our trolly driver said a couple things to them. Then told us we had to go back to the hotel to get a translator... And we asked our trolley driver to just translate for us, since he SAW it happen, and now he's all like, I only know a little bit of english and said he'd be right back, then took off. Cops now giving us blank, "we don't give a shit" stares... So quite frustrated and taken advantage of we just started to walk back to the hotel. which was harder then we thought cuz we got so turned around. We stopped and talked to two English couples walking together, they told us how to get to the water from where we were to find our way back to the hotel. We got to the hotel and walked in and went up to the counter. At this point I'm thoroughly dis-hearted with the Vietnamese.  The clerks at the hotel gave us these weird looks because we weren't staying there, so they didn't want to help us.. I'm starting to tear up at just how F***d uncaring ppl were being, Feeling quite saddened at the compassion of Vietnamese. Steph felt that too and was just like.. "okay.. We would like a train out of Ho Chi Minh". We could barely get the train station website from them, they wanted to book it for us. blah blah.. rar rar. got the website.. then got another website and had the website we were given scratched off.. wtf..

So we got some food nearby, thoroughly starving by now. We ordered rice pourage and some plate of something, It was really not that delicious.. lol.. But we got iced lattes with swirly straws!! So it wasn't so bad haha..

Ubud, Bali Sept 4th-5th

Well! It's September 6th, 2012. I finally got to an internet cafe in Ubud to hook up a hardrive and get my pictures off my camera cards. The reason I can't do this with my travel buddy's tablet is because it doesn't have a usb port. Useless!! Oh wells tho. We will survive haha. This has been an awesome 4 days. feels like longer...

The flights getting here weren't too bad. Kind of an awkward feeling when night never comes.. I left Ottawa around 12pm thanks to my good pals Megan and Ashley who picked me up and drove me to the Airport. Good thing too. As per my usual before having to do anything, I was way behind. I was up till about 3am packing and trying to finish a poster for "Domestic Workers", in Kerala, India. I did get it done luckilly.about half an hour before I had to leave haha. Always rockin the last minute. In my dillusional state I somehow thought I would be able to go to the Daily Grind Cafe in Ottawa and hang up artwork. Hopefully my roomate reads this and does it for me ;) *nudge nudge*. 

My first flight was an hour to Toronto, then I waited about an hour or so and Flew from Toronto to Hong Kong. About a 14 hour flight. I just happened to be sitting beside like the only other white girl within visual range. and we didn't have anyone between. I've been lucking with long flights so far to have to site with 2 other people. She was traveling to Australia to see her brother. And even used to live in Ottawa up till 6 months ago. The world is incredibly small it seems. I've learned to take all this as fated circumstances. Not that we are soul friends for life or anything. but just accepting that I meet who I meet at the right times. On the flight I watched "Confucius" with Chow Young Fat. With Subtitles. I didn't even know he did this movie! He was really amazing. Also Watched a Bruce Lee Documentary. A Little different then "Bruce Lee: Dragon" haha. Way Better. I didn't know he was a Cha Cha Champion. And that he tought so many celebrities "Jeet Kune Do" at his house. Or that All of the movies he did had so much of his real life in them. He really was an incredible person. Never playing a part. Even when Acting, he never put on a face for the "role" was the same on screen as off screen. An important lesson he brought to the world. But he went beyond that. His every move, every step, and every word, was an expression of his true and genuine self. He didn't just fight, he expressed every part of his being with every movement. I'm prolly babeling now, but it's something important I too have learned to do with my art, and am always working on with my life. When I draw a picture, I somehow express everything that I am in that moment, with the lines. You may ask how this is possible? or you may not.  I believe it stems from my personal honesty. Something that has been very hard to find in a world where your told what to be and how to fix yourself from an external perspective at every turn. All I had to do was find the right lines to express myself, carving the way for everything from within myself to pour forward, no easy feet. But afterwords you see how simple it is.

The last flight was only 4 hours. I couldn't choose from a big list of movies, it was an older plane. I watched what was on, I ended up watching Matrix 1. Always a good choice.. I got in around 1am. Originally steph told me that she was going to be there a day before me. But she emailed me while I was in air so I never knew, that she got the date wrong and was getting in the same night as me. So I'm looking all over the place, being followed by cabbies trying to give me a ride, no sign of steph waiting, I didn't write down where we were staying so I couldn't even just go there to find her!! hahah Bad news bears moment. Then I saw her!! This tall blue angel hah. Blue dress, and matching blue pack, leave it to the ladies to co-ordinate while backpacking :P

We got in a cab, but it didn't have a meter, and my friend Rio told me I shouldn't get into cabs without a meter. He wouldn't give us his taxi certification either, so we got out and got our bags and went and found another driver, We got over charged to, like 5 dollars. We found a cab for 80,000 Rupea, which is 8 dollars. instead of 100 000. We should have only paid 50, 000. But what can u do. everyone gets ripped off now and then, and It's not that big of a deal.

We got to the " Matahari Guest House" in Kuta around 2 am. It Took me a few hours to fall asleep getting used to the 12 hour time change. We both woke up around 2pm. Steph hadn't slept much her last week in Seoul. I've bounced back pretty well. All those late nights and random hours I keep already prepared me pretty well for traveling lol.

We didn't get much done on day one, as we were organizing gear and then we had to find some food. we walked and waaaalked and ended up on the beach. then we found out where this place called "Warung Madè". got some balinese and Indonesian foods.OH YES! On our way to dinner a lizard fell on Stephanie's head. more like aimed for it jumping off a building. hahah She freaked right out. Too funny. Then we walked around for a bit more. We ended up back on the beach I think that night, and we just watched the waves. We stood in the water for a bit and felt the tide go in and out, until a big tide came in and soaked our bottoms haha. Awesome!! My first time standing in an ocean!! Ireland was my first time touching an Ocean. The moon was still full that night. I never saw it blue... but I left on the blue moon.There were a few stars out. I haven't seen a lot of stars tho still. We sat on beach trying to dry our wet bums and just chilled, it was a warm night. There was actually a lot of people just sitting on the beach watching the waves. I thought that this light was mars when got on the beach.. low and behold it was definitly a plane.. I'm gunna ask for mercy with the fact I didn't have my glasses on :P.

The Headed out  Tuesday with the Mission to learn to surf! We were gunna pay 45USD each to learn for a couple hours with a company, but it was actually Euros that the price was in, and we didn't bring enough. so then eventually our good pal Cassam who we had been getting all our tour advice from told us there are guys on the beach who would teach us for 150, 000 Rupea. each. which is 30USD for both. instead of like 114Us.

Me and Steph went swimming first before doing any surfing. I finally got the nerve to test my small digital camera's waterproof ability. It went really well! The instructors were just fine. Spoke enough english and had a ball laughing at us and us at ourselves, and cheering us on when we caught a wave I could only hack an hour of it. It's incredibly exhausting!! and I have no muscles or abs. But I did pretty good. I could do it everyday actually. wont be my last time surfing that's for sure. Afterwords we de-salted ourselves, which was good cuz I swollowed so much salt water. haha. I'm still to this day getting sand out of my ears hahah.

We got invited to hang with some Australians drinking with the local surfer guys. Apparently my surf teachers name is Ducky haha. or that's what she called him anyway.

The Australians gave us a turtle ticket. Apparently Every now and then in Kuta they do this massive baby turtle release! My first apalling moment was because they were messing with the natural hatch and journey to the Ocean that I had been taught about in Documentaries, but then I found out that because of the lights from the town, the turtles get confused at night when they hatch and head toward the city instead of the water. My 2nd appalling moment was because civilization had gotten so big that the natural order of nature really was gone.. But it is what it is, and they are doing what they can to continue the process in its current circumstances. So we each got a turtle in a plastic container. some ppl named theirs. I just named mine "Turtle Power"- for u Nathan. Steph named hers Crush. And this guy near me named his Dave (Australian). And we just watched them make their way to sea. It was a race of sorts. For a while mine and stephs were buddy buddy, journeying together, d'awww. I watched some get stepped on by tourists trying to get to the side to take a picture... a little ridiculous... Respect yo?

We went home and got changed and then made our way to our last dinner in Kuta. So many weird gimmicky places to eat at. Nothing by western style music all around, or live bands performing western music. Their is even a place called Bubbe-Gump-Shrimp.. Your prolly thinking.. Forest Gump. But their is no way they would make a restaurant like that after the movie.. out front.. is a bench .. with a box of cholates and a ceramic pair of shoes.. yup.. theee shoes...

We found a place finally with some balinese food. It was an Indian place, so we just got some yummy Dal, and Chick peas, butter chicken, and 3 big naan breads. Tried a naan with dried fruit!! Delicious! and Yogourt Smoothies!! Num Num! Then we headed back to the cafe near our hotel to find a place to stay the next day! We also weren't sure where we wanted to go. I know I wanted to get out of our 15 dollar a night hotel and find a cheaper place like a hostel.

we ended up not finding anything so we just took a shuttle van to Ubud and figured we'd find something when we got there. They didn't have enough seats on the bus for me or steph. So steph ended up sitting on the floor!! hahah And one one woman got on the wrong bus and our driver got super annoyed having to turn around to drop her off after she was shouting, "WHERE ARE YOU TAKING ME!!" But with an Australian accent. I sat next to a couple from the Netherlands. Their is quite a good mixture of people from all over here. And all the locals or vendors just ask, "Where you from?" I find it is for another reason then just wanting to know. These people have a way more connected knowing then people may thinking..

When We got to Ubud, a  man named Ketut asked us if we had a place to stay and we didn't so we followed him haha *Warning flags* His hotel is called "Tunjung- bungalowes" and its this Orange palace of a place with balconies and en-suite bathrooms, and plants everywhere. also a koy fish pond. And his brother took us straight to room number 5, the 5 is on an orange ball.. Idk about you, but this place was our destiny haha. we share a bed, which is fine. We don't care, we have our silk liners we sleep in. and its only 7.50 a night each. pretty amazing, plus we have a drying rack for our clothes. We picked up some laundry powder today from COCO supermarket to clean our clothes. I've been using my soap bar up to this point to scrub the travel sweat away haha.

Our first night in Ubud and we saw a "Barong and Keris" Dance. Similar to the one I saw at the Indonesian Embassy in Ottawa. But so much more. The story it told seemed to be that of a retelling of the history of humanity, and the struggle between "Dharma," and "Adarma" or good and evil I think. We had to rush to go back to NanJung to get more money for dinner since we spent it on the tickets!! We ate at this lovely restaurant with lots of tasty health foods and pro-biotic smoothes, we've eaten there for all our meals so far in Ubud!! It has pillows you can sit on and cool meditation art. A lot of yogi's come here to eat. The whole place is filled with Incense and calming music... Plus pillows this is a recipe for nap tie. which I almost do everytime I go there haha.

Our first full day here in Ubud was September 5th. We were just gunna walk to the elephant cave Temple but our Hotel owner Ketut said it was too far, so we decided to pay him to be our prive driver for the day for 170,000 rupea each. about 35 dollars. Little cheaper then a tour, and we got to take our time and no worries of our tour group leaving us behind. Much better! We spent like 2 hours at the elephant cave. which should have only taken us about 30 mins, but we walked on these paths and went to these other temples that weren't part of the elephant cave package, so we payed 20 rupea to go further on the path, some guy tried to be our guide, until he told us he wanted 10 dollars which we didn't really care to pay him so we just walked it ourselves.  Went across this shifty bamboo bridge. chilled at these abandoned temples built in the bottom of this cliff. amazingly gorgeous sites. and water.... apparently we could of gone swimming there, but we didn't know.oh wells!

After the Elephant caves we went to a temple with Rice paddies! Never seen a rice paddie before. I still have to find out what rice looks like when it's pulled out of the water. Their was a ceremony going on at the Temple that day. Ketut said that it was for family's getting blessings I believe. The intense music they play is called "Trance" music (not like rave music in Canada, but spiritual tripping without the drugs) . And it really is. Tho you know those beatles in Canada that make that loud screeching sound on hot days? You should of heard them at the elephant caves. I felt all the energy in my body seemingly uplifting from my feet to my head and beyond. Keeping our great mother Terra in high spirits me suspects. Who needs drugs when nature is a drug all its own, and all around you.  Tho we were offered mushrooms randomly. Its like duck duck goose, but instead of duck its 'Taxi', and instead of goose its mushroooms? and you have go to a higher octave when u say mushroOMS. haha

After  The Elephant cave we went to the Stone Temple. We ended up buying sarongs, which were scarves, not sarongs,  but we wore them as sarongs for a few days. The worst thing is the cost at all these temples. It adds up. We were "late" we thought to see the ceremony, but it was pretty ongoing, and it was a family receiving blessings from the priests. But they had the band playing trance music for it. and lots of inscents burning. It was called the Stone temple because it was built into the side of a rock, and it was surrounded by rice paddies. 

They had these 3 huge half pyramids carved into the stone.

We headed back to the car, and went on to a view of Mount Batur, and Lake Batur. You could see the path from the Eruption in December 1999 I think. Ketut said he was here watching it erupt. You can see the lava path below where its all black and scorched, and where it's still green. I got bombarded by women trying to get me to  buy some of their fruit. They just cut it and make you try it then charge you if u buy it. The best one was so expensive. I saw ketut laughing from inside his truck at me surrounded.. Steph was inside using the bathroom.. hahah I had no backup!! Their is a reason why women are usually selling and not men. Women can get the job done with their subtle pushyness haha. 

We saw some mandarine trees on our way down.  Ketut was trying to get deal on them for the Kuningan ceremony. We headed back to the hotel and then out to dinner. We keep going to this place "Atmans". With Organic and tasty tasty food.  Fell asleep basically waiting for it. And they have really speedy service, I was just bombed. I think we were in bed by like 9pm that night haha. We are up everyday by 8 or sooner. 

Who knew I would have to go to the other-side of the world to finally operate on a normal time schedule. Its settled, I was born on the wrong side of the world... I have always been oddly drawn to Asia, that MUST be why ;)

Kuta, Bali Sept 2nd-4th 2012

Well! It's September 6th, 2012. I finally got to an internet cafe in Ubud to hook up a hardrive and get my pictures off my camera cards. The reason I can't do this with my travel buddy's tablet is because it doesn't have a usb port. Useless!! Oh wells tho. We will survive haha. This has been an awesome 4 days. Feels like longer...

 

The flights getting here weren't too bad. Kind of an awkward feeling when night never comes.. I left Ottawa around 12pm thanks to my good pals Megan and Ashley who picked me up and drove me to the Airport. Good thing too. As per my usual before having to do anything, I was way behind. I was up till about 3am packing and trying to finish a poster for "Domestic Workers", in Kerala, India. I did get it done luckilly.about half an hour before I had to leave haha. Always rockin the last minute. In my dillusional state I somehow thought I would be able to go to the Daily Grind Cafe in Ottawa and hang up artwork.



Hong Kong-Night



My first flight was an hour to Toronto, then I waited about an hour or so and Flew from Toronto to Hong Kong. About a 14 hour flight. I just happened to be sitting beside like the only other white girl within visual range. and we didn't have anyone between. I've been lucking with long flights so far to have to site with 2 other people. She was traveling to Australia to see her brother. And even used to live in Ottawa up till 6 months ago. The world is incredibly small it seems. I've learned to take all this as fated circumstances. Not that we are soul friends for life or anything. but just accepting that I meet who I meet at the right times. On the flight I watched "Confucius" with Chow Young Fat. With Subtitles. I didn't even know he did this movie! He was really amazing. Also Watched a Bruce Lee Documentary. A Little different then "Bruce Lee: Dragon" haha. Way Better. I didn't know he was a Cha Cha Champion. And that he tought so many celebrities "Jeet Kune Do" at his house. Or that All of the movies he did had so much of his real life in them. He really was an incredible person. Never playing a part. Even when Acting, he never put on a face for the "role" was the same on screen as off screen. An important lesson he brought to the world. But he went beyond that. His every move, every step, and every word, was an expression of his true and genuine self. He didn't just fight, he expressed every part of his being with every movement. I'm prolly babeling now, but it's something important I too have learned to do with my art, and am always working on with my life. When I draw a picture, I somehow express everything that I am in that moment, with the lines. You may ask how this is possible? Or you may not.  I believe it stems from my personal honesty. Something that has been very hard to find in a world where your told what to be and how to fix yourself from an external perspective at every turn. All I had to do was find the right lines to express myself, carving the way for everything from within myself to pour forward, no easy feet. But afterwords you see how simple it is.



Sept 1/2nd-First citing of
the moon since Aug 31st

The last flight was only 4 hours. I couldn't choose from a big list of movies, it was an older plane. I watched what was on, I ended up watching Matrix 1. Always a good choice.. I got in around 1am. Originally steph told me that she was going to be there a day before me. But she emailed me while I was in air so I never knew, that she got the date wrong and was getting in the same night as me. So I'm looking all over the place, being followed by cabbies trying to give me a ride, no sign of steph waiting, I didn't write down where we were staying so I couldn't even just go there to find her!! hahah Bad news bears moment. Then I saw her!! This tall blue angel hah. Blue dress, and matching blue pack, leave it to the ladies to co-ordinate while backpacking :P

We got in a cab, but it didn't have a meter, and my friend Rio told me I shouldn't get into cabs without a meter. He wouldn't give us his taxi certification either, so we got out and got our bags and went and found another driver, We got over charged like 5 dollars. We found a cab for 80,000 Rupea, which is 8 dollars. instead of 100 000. We should have only paid 50, 000. But what can u do. Everyone gets ripped off now and then, it's not that big a deal at 10 bucks I suppose.

We got to the "Matahari Guest House" in Kuta around 2 am. It Took me a few hours to fall asleep getting used to the 12 hour time change. We both woke up around 2pm. Steph hadn't slept much her last week in Seoul. I've bounced back pretty well. All those late nights and random hours I keep already prepared me pretty well for traveling lol.

 We didn't get much done on day one, as we were organizing gear and then we had to find some food. we walked and waaaalked and ended up on the beach. then we found out where this place called "Warung Madè". got some balinese and Indonesian foods.OH YES! On our way to dinner a lizard fell on Stephanie's head. more like aimed for it jumping off a building. hahah She freaked right out. Too funny. Then we walked around for a bit more. We ended up back on the beach I think that night, and we just watched the waves. We stood in the water for a bit and felt the tide go in and out, until a big tide came in and soaked our bottoms haha. Awesome!! My first time standing in an ocean!! Ireland was my first time touching an Ocean. The moon was still full that night. I never saw it blue... but I left on the blue moon.There were a few stars out. I haven't seen a lot of stars tho still. We sat on beach trying to dry our wet bums and just chilled, it was a warm night. There was actually a lot of people just sitting on the beach watching the waves. I thought that this light was mars when got on the beach.. low and behold it was definitly a plane.. I'm gunna ask for mercy with the fact I didn't have my glasses on :P.



Swimming in the Ocean for the First time! Kuta Beach, Bali 



The Headed out  Tuesday with the Mission to learn to surf! We were gunna pay 45USD each to learn for a couple hours with a company, but it was actually Euros that the price was in, and we didn't bring enough. so then eventually our good pal Cassam who we had been getting all our tour advice from told us there are guys on the beach who would teach us for 150, 000 Rupea. each. which is 30USD for both. instead of like 114Us.

 

Me and Steph went swimming first before doing any surfing. I finally got the nerve to test my small digital camera's waterproof ability. It went really well! The instructors were just fine. Spoke enough english and had a ball laughing at us and us at ourselves, and cheering us on when we caught a wave I could only hack an hour of it. It's incredibly exhausting!! and I have no muscles or abs. But I did pretty good. I could do it everyday actually. wont be my last time surfing that's for sure. Afterwords we de-salted ourselves, which was good cuz I swollowed so much salt water. haha. I'm still to this day getting sand out of my ears hahah.

We got invited to hang with some Australians drinking with the local surfer guys. Apparently my surf teachers name is Ducky haha. or that's what she called him anyway.



The Australians gave us a turtle ticket. Apparently Every now and then in Kuta they do this massive baby turtle release! My first apalling moment was because they were messing with the natural hatch and journey to the Ocean that I had been taught about in Documentaries, but then I found out that because of the lights from the town, the turtles get confused at night when they hatch and head toward the city instead of the water. My 2nd appalling moment was because civilization had gotten so big that the natural order of nature really was gone.. But it is what it is, and they are doing what they can to continue the process in its current circumstances. So we each got a turtle in a plastic container. some ppl named theirs. I just named mine "Turtle Power"- for u Nathan. Steph named hers Crush. And this guy near me named his Dave (Australian). And we just watched them make their way to sea. It was a race of sorts. For a while mine and stephs were buddy buddy, journeying together, d'awww. I watched some get stepped on by tourists trying to get to the side to take a picture... a little ridiculous... Respect yo?



We went to the hotel and got changed, then made our way to our last dinner in Kuta. So many weird gimmicky places to eat at. Nothing but western style music all around, or live bands performing western music. Their is even a place called Bubba-Gump-Shrimp.. Your prolly thinking.. Forest Gump. But their is no way they would make a restaurant like that after the movie.. out front.. is a bench .. with a box of chocolates and a ceramic pair of shoes.. yup.. theee shoes...

We found a place finally with some balinese food. It was an Indian place, so we just got some yummy Dal, and Chick peas, butter chicken, and 3 big naan breads. Tried a naan with dried fruit!! Delicious! and Yogourt Smoothies!! Num Num! Then we headed back to the cafe near our hotel to find a place to stay the next day! We also weren't sure where we wanted to go. I know I wanted to get out of our 15 dollar a night hotel and find a cheaper place like a hostel. 

Really we just wanted to get out of Kuta. It was so touristy, and really inauthentic with the Vans, Polo, Roxy and other Western style shopping. I coulda stayed for you forevor, mistress of the sea, but never fear, we shall meet again.

Guatemala Stove Project Interviews

For all Those who Followed my Guatemala Blogging (Where this blog all started) Here are some Interviews me and Karen Did back in March 2011 with some of the members. More to come!

They are gearing up for their end of year fundraising push!

You can also donate online! You can fund an entire stove for only $225 CND! www.GuatemalaStoveProject.org

Celina Clarke

Rita Redner

Jim Wallace

Tom Clarke part 1

Tom Clarke Part 2

Tom Clarke Part 3

Tom Clarke Part 4

Negative Nancy and the Mirror

I was at a cafe in Ottawa Yesterday doing some colour work when I overheard a conversation between a couple girls and a guy sharing a pitcher of beer. (Yes u can get beer at coffee shops these days!! its quite well rounded for all needs). They got onto the topic of the National Art Gallery of Ontario. It's hard not to think about that obscenely large painting with the dot in the middle that sells for a billion dollars, I'll admit I too have pondered the why of this piece. They had the pretty common statement to make "I would never pay that for it, its so ridiculous." Or "I get it, But it's stupid" type stuff. Then They started talking about Van Gogh. BIAS ALERT. I love the Guy. Can't get enough! Read some of his letters last night in bed!!....... Anyway... They talked about one of his self portraits. "Like the brush strokes are all whatever and he turned so you can't even see his cut off ear, like how does this stuff constitute art, so stupid". Being an Artist type, while creating art, and listening to this, I became quite frustrating. In my mind were fantasies of standing up and shouting, "LEAVE VAN GOGH ALONE!!! HE'S THE SHIT". Of course I restrained my self and kept working, and will now delight YOU 12 followers with the musings of my brain mass.

I'm quite over this negative nancy type conversation starting. I wonder sometimes. How can everything suck. Really? How can a person just talk about how shitty so many things are. Always find the bad. Always judge the person. Where does judging come from??? Well Scientifically it comes from inside u. I'm sure you could point to some area on ur body like ur 3rd rib and say "HERE IT CAME FROM HERE!! DAMN JUDGY RIB!" Or maybe that's only something I would say. REGARDLESS... It comes from you. But how is it that we deduce such a statement about something seemingly separate from ourselves? The mirror effect some would say. We complain about what others really reflect back at us. What does that mean? So If someone shows you something that YOU don't like, its because you don't like this about you. It's not something YOU would do or say. So because you wouldn't do or say that then its not okay for others to do or say this.

That is how I felt and where aaaaall the lovely things I wanted to say came from for these 3 peeps. I love Van Gogh. I understand why I love him, because I understand him. I relate to him. Especially his crazy period. I understand his art because I understand my art. And Why I do the art that I do.

Its not really new for most artists who find their unique style. The style is a result of our understanding of self honesty. Being and Living true to everything about ourselves. And expressing our truth. OUR truth. No one elses. But what is usually found when this happens, is that our truth, is other peoples truths too.

So back to the judgers and nay sayers. I'm most bothered by their surface layer of hate for art, and their ill attempt to find the why of the art. It's what you do? No? Yes? I think yes. You want to be transported, pulled, or welcomed in to the world and energy of the piece you are attempting to understand. Step inside it. And apply it to yourself. How does your self see it. When it is truly attempting to understand it without thoughts. Without our own perceptions. Being open to what it has to say, without trying to use what we know to speak for it. Not an easy thing.

Van Gogh didn't paint hoping to be in a museum or gallery. He had a gift. A gift of a visual voice to make up for the audible voice he lacked. Lived in the quietness. His mind prolly never shut up. I hear that! But on the outside he is watching. And had such an understanding of life. Daily he would go and look at how light touched people and things. Reveling in the miracle of god he would say. Then wandering why people were so cruel to each other.

He did art only so he could push his limits. and get better. He may not of drew perfect proportions and perfect flowers. So What? One must understand Why he didn't draw perfect proportions. or or perfect flowers.

Look at Picasso. He had so many styles and mediums. All attempts to understand reality as he understood it, as his understanding changed and evolved. Some of it he outright cut up and put in different order. Because what does the order matter? When its the essence of the sum of the parts.

Art is and at its core will always be attempts at expressing our SELF. The pursuit of our self. Doesn't matter how its done. Because how you do it is perfect. As long as you do it for you. Then it will always be right. As Long as it is the best YOU got when you do it. Then that's all one can ever hope to do in life captured in permanency.

Self portraits is the most real expression an artist can do.  To capture who you think you are in that moment. How you percieve yourself to look in the eyes of another. The Ultimate mirror. Each brush stroke a stroke towards the visual collection of matter in the tangible world. Each a piece in the puzzle of the sum total of your essence. From the tone, the light, and pose you choose.

So next time when I hear someone talk about art, I hope it is in an attempt to understand the world going on within the artist at the time that they gave birth to this piece. Because every line, every colour, and every brush stroke is a window and a portal into the artists devinity at that moment.

As per the Giant painting with a dot in the middle.. Next time you look at it. Understand, that you didn't paint it. You didn't have that thought. But someone did, and they somehow beautifully captured that flash of a thought and turned the formless into form. So that you, could be transported into that moment of formlessness within their mind. And have that same thought. Sharing in the magnificence that we as humans here have. To see something, and then to feel the intention of it created out of the organization of matter by the creator of that intent.

THAT is the brilliance and beauty one should strive to see, in all things, in all life. in all people. Not to judge that they aren't expressing themselves how we wish them to. But they are expressing themselves exactly how they must at that moment. Nothing more.

Including those you pass by, who you may think aren't all "there" in your mind. They are exactly where they are, because they and all people walk the sum total of their essence as a human in all moments, always and forevour changing. If you wanna hold onto the past, Then hold onto it. If you wanna wear 5 layers of makeup, then wear 5 layers of make-up. If you wanna dye your hair purple and skip down a busy city sidewalk, then I will have the best afternoon moment ever seeing it. Or perhaps you seeing me.

Regardless, what you do in this moment, is perfect. Because its what you choose to do. If you choose to change, then change. The only one holding you back is you. Often out of fear. This world has a lot of it. So one less person hiding behind the fear of accepting the beauty and majestic magic of everything in the present, is really good for the world, and beyond.

Have a Magical Day and take a moment to be wowed
Peace!
Sarah